Dolly's Spa Day

By: D. R. Nyan-chan


Amidst the heavy rain, a black limo rolled up to one of the newest spas in town: Green and White, What a Sight.  The entire building was painted in the vertical stripes of its namesake and its reputation was shrouded in mystery.

*fwoop*

A large, black lace umbrella unfurled from the back door and a tuxedo-clad man in his early twenties with short, brown hair stiffly and sluggishly stepped out.  After a few seconds of him staring straight ahead with his blank, green eyes, the chauffer asked, “Is everything okay, sir?”

“B-bill?” the man mumbled in a far-off fashion.

“Really?  Well I hate to ruin the moment.  Are you sure you don’t just want it mailed?”

The man stiffly and slowly shook his head.  The chauffer shrugged and headed to the front of the limo.  A few minutes later, he returned with a card reader and an invoice.  The man slowly and clumsily presented a wad of cash, but then a pale hand grasped his wrist.

“Stevie, Sweetie…” Dolly said with a slight smirk.  “I thought I told you that it was my turn to take care of this.”  After some twitching and a little extra force applied to his arm courtesy of Dolly, Steve relented without ever breaking his gaze at the building in front of him.  Dolly pulled an even larger wad of cash from her purse and said, “Here’s a little something extra for your trouble.  Don’t bother waiting up for us.”

There was a definite spring in the chauffer’s step as he headed back to the front, started his car, and drove off.  Once they were alone, Dolly grabbed Steve’s cash and sorted through it, eventually finding a barely legible note that read, “Help!  Kidnap!  Call Cops.”

“Cute,” Dolly said with a scowl.  “Real cute.  I don’t know when or even how you were able to do this, but that was your last chance.  It’s wonderful, isn’t it?  My Sissylin.  One dose and you’re practically my puppet all while retaining your awareness.”

Steve simply resumed staring blankly; though he was able to move his fingers slightly, it took all of his effort to do even that of his own volition.  Dolly simply clasped his hand and said, “Oh, don’t worry, Stevie.  I’ll just up the dose next time.  I simply wanted to ensure that you were aware of your masculinity being taken from you step by step.”

Steve gurgled and made a few unintelligible sounds.

Dolly placed a finger to his mouth.  “Now none of that.  You only have yourself to blame.  You were the one who cut up all my custom pink ‘tummy tubes.’  I mean, how is my newest doll supposed to be able to eat?”

Steve let out a few stifled moans.

“Yes you do,” Dolly whispered in a harsh tone.  “Did you really think that I’d buy such a lowly, pathetic excuse?  Since when does reorganizing a bookshelf require you to use your tongue?  I don’t even want to know what the can opener was for.  Now march!”

With a sudden slap to his rear, Dolly was able to prod Steve into entering the establishment.  Almost immediately, Dolly’s nose was filled with a noticeably fresh minty scent that made her feel dizzy for a moment.  However, the uneasiness soon passed, at least until she saw the receptionist.  The woman wore a green and white striped uniform and a very wide grin.  However, Dolly partially cringed when she saw that the employee’s hair had been styled into a long mullet.

“Can I help you?” the receptionist asked.

Dolly took a deep breath to calm herself, but ended up gagging on the mintiness.  She took another look around.  Strange concoctions and creams for sale?  Oddly soothing music that she was somehow okay with?  Steve slowly shuffling away?  Yeah, this was definitely a spa, despite the fact that there were no online reviews and she had never even heard of the place before getting that free couples coupon in the mail.  Wait…Steve slowly shuffling away?

“And where do you think you’re going, Honey?”  Dolly grabbed Steve’s arm and pulled him back just before he could nudge the door ajar.  “You definitely need more Sissylin.”

“Sissylin?” the receptionist’s eyes widened and she gazed closely at Steve.  “How come his ears aren’t purple?”

Dolly immediately clenched up.  Did she really mention Sissylin out loud?  Trying to regain her composure, Dolly asked, “Wh-what do you mean?”

“You’re trying to feminize that man, aren’t you?” the receptionist asked.

Dolly froze in place except for a slight nod.  However, the receptionist simply smiled and said, “Two extra-girly package specials coming right up.”

“Th-that’s okay?” Dolly asked.

“Sure.  You both just need to sign something for us.  Is he just on Sissylin?”

“Y-yes?”

The receptionist leaned forward and whispered, “I would love to know your secret.  Normally, the purple ears are a dead giveaway whenever someone uses Sissylin.”

Dolly raised an eyebrow in bewilderment.  “W-wait, Sissylin is my own special concoction.  I’ve never even told anyone else about it.”

“O-oh, my mistake,” the receptionist quickly said.  “I was thinking of another drug.  Sis-Sissiloft!  Yeah, that’s the one.”

Dolly shrugged off the awkward moment and signed the sheet before turning around, grabbing Steve before he could waddle away again, and bringing him back to the desk.  “It’s time to sign your life away, my soon-to-be pretty doll.”

As Steve manipulated the pen against his will, Dolly presented her couples coupon, which quickly evaporated in a bright green flame.  The receptionist casually waved the smoke away and said, “Don’t worry about it.  I’ve already entered everything in.  You’re covered.”

Dolly smiled after coughing a bit from the strange smoke.  Once she finished pulling Steve back once again, Dolly said, “Wait, two extra-girly package specials?  We only need one.”

The receptionist fidgeted a bit before saying, “Th-that’s so you can accompany him while getting your own…royal treatment.  We just list it that way for convenience.”

Dolly shrugged and pulled Steve along.  She soon stopped short in her tracks just in time to avoid getting fried by a random arc of energy from the nearby walls.  The place was huge, way too much so for the building’s outside dimensions to normally allow, but what really caught Dolly’s attention was something else: mullets.  As far as the eye could see, almost everyone in the common areas seemed to be sporting mullets.

“Do I really need to keep you on a leash?” Dolly said as she pulled Steve back yet again; his dosage was definitely wearing off.

“If it’s a leash you need, I have one right here,” a mulleted employee said.  She had brown eyes and was wearing a green bunny girl costume with white stockings and green heels.

Dolly accepted the green strap and applied the accompanying futuristic-looking bondage sling, which encased Steve’s arms almost instantly.

“Would you also like a gag for him, not that anyone here would help him escape.”

Dolly shook her head.  “I’ll let him savor the last words he’ll say while he’s still his old self.  Isn’t that right, Honey?”

Steve mumbled something in reply.  Dolly wasn’t sure what he said, but figured it was probably something explicit.

The employee asked, “You’re Dolly, right?  I’m Ms. Coif.  I’ll be in charge of leading you both to Paradise.  Well, you at least.”

Dolly couldn’t help snickering before asking, “You seem familiar.   Don’t I know you from somewhere?”

Ms. Coif smiled and shook her head, causing her brunette mulleted mane to swing to and fro.  “I don’t think so.”

Dolly followed the attendant with her increasingly defiant “doll” in tow as they entered a secluded room with strange, purple splotches saturating the wall.  Ms. Coif filled a couple small bins with water and said, “First, we’ll pull those nasty-wasty poisons out of your system with nice, relaxing foot detox.”  She then placed a couple cylindrical devices into the tiny tubs and almost immediately a strange, purple substance spread from them.

“Wait, what is this?” Dolly asked.

Ms. Coif presented an unnaturally wide smile and said, “Oh, the purple means that it’s removing toxic masculinity.  You’re becoming more feminine by the moment.”

Dolly crossed her arms and scowled.  “My feet aren’t even touching it.”

Ms. Coif’s eyebrow twitched for a moment and after a few seconds, she giggled and said, “It’s really, really effective.  Wait until you see what happens when you’re actually soaking in it.”

At that moment, the purple mixture began to bubble violently as if it was boiling.  Several little spits shot everywhere and made hissing sounds upon contact with the walls.  Suddenly, the foot tubs dissolved and the purple water melted away a large portion of the floor and the floor below it, a large portion below that floor, too.

“That’s it, we’re out.”  Dolly grabbed Steve and quickly walked towards the exit, or at least where she thought the exit was.  All the way, Ms. Coif kept on pestering her with apologies.  Cheap special effects, only inorganic materials are affected, the batch was defective, each excuse only brought on more and more choice explicatives from Dolly.

Finally, Ms. Coif leapt in front of the two and said, “Wait, I know.  How about a free sample?”  She instantly sprayed both Dolly and Steve with a strong-smelling perfume.  “Do you like it?  Please give me a chance to make this right.”

“Ugh, nasty…”  Dolly gagged and coughed for several moments before glaring at Ms. Coif, sighing, and saying, “Fine, but don’t ever spray that garbage on me again.

Ms. Coif smiled and giggled before taking them to another room.  “This is our deluxe massage chamber for special boys.”

Dolly smirked when she saw the table laden with restraints.  In no time at all, both of them were laying down and clad only in towels, though Steve ended up with a few extra “accessories.”

*whirrr*
*whirrr*
*crack*
*crackle*

Dolly had never had a robot massage her before and she started to wonder how she ever lived without it.  Meanwhile, Ms. Coif examined Steve and said, “My my, you’re so tense.”

Steve squirmed bit by bit as if he only had the strength of an infant.

“Aw, so cute,” Ms. Coif said.  “Now just relax.  Think of me as your Babysitter.”  After a couple joint pops, Steve yelped from the ensuing pain.

“Man up, you big baby,” Dolly said.  “While you still can, at least…”

Steve’s face contorted as Ms. Coif pressed deep and hard before laying some stones on Steve’s back.  “Oh my, you’re really messed up down here.”  Ms. Coif gave Steve’s hips a playful slap while tears streamed down his eyes.  “This calls for a specialized tool: the pelvic expander.”

Steve whimpered at the sight of the gnarled, oversized metal mess while Dolly couldn’t help laughing.  “Nice.  She’s sure to look pretty after that.  Ms. Coif, are you sure I don’t know you from somewhere?”

“I’m pretty sure.”  Ms. Coif gave a somewhat empty smile as she plunged the tip of the tool into Steve’s behind before slowly worming and twisting even further in.  “If that was the case, I would’ve already helped you with your problem.”

“You already are.”

Ms. Coif let out a little giggle.  “I meant your hair.  Something just…feels off about it.  I can fix that for you, though.”

“I already have my hair the way I like it,” Dolly said.  Inwardly, she was cursing about how someone who wore a mullet of all things had the gall to even critique her.  She also couldn’t shake off the feeling that she really had met Ms. Coif before.  Something seemed…so familiar about her.  Still, it wasn’t important enough to pursue.

A few clicks later, Ms. Coif removed the twisted torture device and swatted Steve’s feminine hips.  “Much better.  You didn’t even lose your kneecaps.

Steve let out a little exclaim in surprise and Ms. Coif said, “Oh nothing, don’t worry about it.”  Dolly just rolled her eyes and decided to go with the flow.

Once Steve was leashed and bound again, he clumsily waddled along while Dolly and Ms. Coif carried him to a room with a single shower.  After he was chained inside and the curtain drawn, Dolly asked, “So is this were he gets that soothing, feminine look with body creams?”

“Uh, yeah,” Ms. Coif said.  “Around here, we call it a chemical peel.”  She activated a nearby console and the shower’s nozzle turned on at full blast, causing Steve to scream bloody murder.

Dolly immediately covered her ears and asked, “What type of chemicals?”

Ms. Coif turned, gave Dolly a blank stare, tilted her head, smiled, and said, “I have no idea.”

Whatever the mixture was, it smelled of lavender and Brussels sprouts; it was also giving Dolly coughing fits.  Meanwhile, Steve’s screams seemed to jump up octave after octave as his silhouette changed dramatically.  However, though he seemed to be in agony, Steve didn’t so much as pull against his chains.  At the same time, Dolly’s feet also seemed glued in place.

When the chemical mists subsided, a whimpering female Steve could be seen clutching her chest.  A sudden DING them emanated from Ms. Coif’s console and she tore off the emerged ticket before reading it out loud.  “Side effects include swelling, GABA/glycine toxicosis, and a strange craving for pickles.”

“Oh, there’s definitely ‘swelling.’”  Dolly eyed Steve’s newly expanded rack.  “It’s pretty massive.  We may have to do something about that.”

Steve waded through her longer hair and managed to part it just in time for her eyes to widen and realize that Little Steve was nowhere to be found.  She frantically looked around to see if it had fallen off, but there was no trace.

“I’m thinking blonde hair for this new doll,” Dolly said.  “Pretty curls, a few ribbons, a nice dress, then all she’ll need is a new name.”

“N-new name?” Steve said with a shaky and very feminine voice.

“Something that accurately describes what you are, something like Princess Pretty-Puff-“  Dolly leaned in closer and whispered, “-Pinky-Butt-Cheater-Face-Sissy-Pants-Glitter-Bum and that’s just your first name.  By the time I’m done with you, all you’ll be able to think about is the fact that every degrading or girly word will actually be able to double as your nickname.  Well, that and how you’re going to be a good dolly for your mistress.”

Ms. Coif quickly wrapped Princess in a tight towel and she was soon carted off to the next room where a few incense sticks burned next to a couple of cushioned chairs.  “It’s Mani-Pedi Time!” Ms. Coif said.  “We’re also offering free facials.  Care to join in, Miss?”

“No, I-I think I’ll pass.”

Ms. Coif clasped her hands together and pleaded with wide eyes.  “Pleeease?”

“S-sure, why not?”  Dolly’s head felt a little foggy as she sat down.  Somehow, the room seemed extra soothing despite the strange patchwork wall and the customer running around the hall screaming, “They won’t come out!  The cucumbers!  I can’t see!”

Dolly watched blissfully as Princess was latched into her cuffs.  Just as the former Steve tried to break free, Ms. Coif placed a collar around her neck, paralyzing everything below except breathing and the like.  Ms. Coif sighed with relief and said, “Oh good, I grabbed the right one.  Now be a good girl and stay still, Princess.”

“Or else,” Dolly said with a chuckle.  She then stared at Ms. Coif, who was putting Super Sissy Pink Glitter polish on Princess’s nails. She then started applying special foundation to Princess’s face.  Once the pretty pink glitter, eyeshadow, and lipstick were applied, it almost seemed like Princess couldn’t relay any expression save for smiling and puckering.

“The best thing about this makeup is that it’ll never come off,” Ms. Coif said with a smile and a slight twitch of her head.  Dolly giggled and looked on, taking in every second of Princess’s torment.  She knew Ms. Coif from somewhere, she was sure of it.  However, she just couldn’t quite finger that mullet.

“Gothic Black for you?” Ms. Coif asked.

“It’s not the same stuff you put on her, is it?” Dolly asked.

“No, this is a different mixture.”

Dolly closed her eyes and lay back as she was pampered.  Everything seemed so serene and even the weird incense felt like it fit.  Dolly took a deep breath before puckering up for her own black lipstick.

“And now for the next step, mud baths!”

“After getting dolled up?” Dolly asked.

“Don’t worry.”  Ms. Coif giggled as she removed the paralysis collar and re-leashed Princess.  “This is a special mud and you’re treatment here won’t be phased by it.  It’s an exotic blend that can’t be found anywhere else and once it seeps into your pores, you’ll be a new woman.”

“You hear that, Princess?” Dolly asked in a taunting fashion.  “Doesn’t it feel good to enjoy some girl time?”  Ms. Coif forced Princess to nod “yes.”

When they arrived in the next room, the tubs of muck were already bubbling.  While Princess was forcefully chained into hers, Dolly slowly stepped into the other tub.  The strange goo felt warm, smooth, and a bit on the syrupy side.  Once she lay her head back and made sure none of her hair was in the mud, a device activated from behind her.

“We do free hair-washing during the process,” Ms. Coif said.  “For some reason, the mud clearing your pores seems to enhance our special shampoo designed to fix all flaws present in our clients’ hair.”

“Whatever,” Dolly said while stretching her arms and legs around a bit under the surface.

“I’ve also added blonde coloring for your friend.”

Dolly let out a wide grin.  “Perfect.”

As she lay there and let her scalp be massaged, Dolly slowly started to doze off into sleep.

SCHLORP!

Dolly barely avoided a second mound of mud covering her face.  She glared at the large-breasted perpetrator and shouted, “What’s the idea?  I’m still using this one.”

“Oh?”  The blonde-haired worker wearing a green and white jumpsuit turned around; she had an unusually carefree look in her eyes.  “Don’t worry, I’m just refilling the mud.  I was told to keep it away from your feet at all costs, or was that your face?”

Dolly rolled her eyes back in obvious contempt for this brainless idiot.

“Oh, that means you what to talk to me!”  Much to Dolly’s chagrin, the worker sat down right next to her.  “My name is uh, uh…”  She quickly dug around in some pockets and pulled out a card.  “My name is ‘It’s Durian, you idiot.’  Yeah, that sounds about right.  What’s yours?”

“Dolly…” Dolly mumbled.

“Nice to meet you,” Durian said.  “Say, I was told you could help me with something.  You know that door over there?  I keep walking into it, but it won’t open for me.  Do you know why?”

“Maybe because it’s not automatic?”  Dolly desperately wanted to escape, but the robotic washer still had a hold on her hair.

“I know that, but why won’t it open on it’s own?”

Dolly’s jaw plopped and she stared at Durian in bewilderment.  “Are you for real?”

“No, I’m ‘It’s Durian, you idiot,” Durian said with a cheerful smile.

Dolly let out a huge, audible groan.  Durian simply laughed and said, “That’s the same expression nearly everybody gives me.  Fortunately, Mistress Lizzie told me what it meant.  I like you, too.”

“Do you even know how to breathe?” Dolly shouted.

Durian rummaged for another card, inhaled, exhaled, and then said, “Yes.”

“Has anyone ever tried to kill you?”

“My partner says she’ll do it all the time, but then she runs something through me and then I wake up, I laugh, and them she makes that same noise so that I know she likes me…”

Durian just wouldn’t stop talking about the most nonsensical things.  Five minutes in and Dolly was already staring intently at the light fixture above her and willing it to suddenly fall and put her out of her misery; even outright saying that she didn’t want to talk to this super idiot didn’t accomplish anything.  Dolly felt like she was rapidly losing IQ points just from listening to Durian talk.  Finally, an idea popped into her head and she asked, “Hey, weren’t you supposed to refill the mud?”

“Oh yeah!” Durian quickly grabbed her shovel.  “I’d better get back outside before it stops raining.”

“Wait a minute,” Dolly said, “isn’t this supposed to be a special mud?”

Durian nodded.  “Yep, an exotic blend.  I dug it up from the backyard, myself.  There’s lots of it hidden under the grass for some reason.  Bootleg also told me that it makes for really tasty pies.”

“PIES?”  Dolly quickly shot up as the mud dripped from her body.  Fortunately, the device that held her head in place had finished and released her hair just in time.

Durian quickly dug around through her pockets again and pulled out a perfume bottle.  “Uh what was the saying?  Oh!  ‘Stop forgetting, you loser!’”  With that, Durian sprayed the perfume on herself and collapsed from dizziness.

“And what was that supposed to accomplish?” Dolly asked while holding her nose.

“It would make you more like me?” Durian said with a giggle.

Dolly gave Durian a swift kick in the mouth, which would’ve been a lot more practical if she was wearing her combat boots.  Durian simply giggled the pain away, her smile indicating that none of her teeth were even cracked.  Dolly then turned to the other tub and noticed that Princess was nowhere to be found.  As Dolly swore like a sailor in Durian’s face for not paying attention, Durian simply kept on smiling and eventually said, “I really like you, so will she when they’re done in the next room.”  She then tried to hug the muddy Dolly, only for Dolly to push her down into the muck.

“What are they doing?” Dolly asked with gritted teeth.

“I’m not supposed to tell you that they wanted me to talk to you while they took your friend next door, so please don’t tell yourself,” Durian said.  “By the way, Wrangler’s going to really love your hair.”

“M-my hair?”  A sudden chill ran down Dolly’s spine as she walked over to a nearby mirror; a bloodcurdling scream soon emanated from the entire complex.  A mullet.  That shampoo machine had fashioned her hair into a mullet.

“Don’t forget to smile,” Durian said.  “Everyone else does when they’re like that.”

Dolly was so angry that she barely had the semblance of mind to grab a towel.  On the way to retrieving Princess, another employee walked up to Dolly and said, “Wow, you look amazing!”  Dolly gave such a hateful look in response that the entire hall felt like ice.  However, the employee just giggled, pointed, and said, “I believe what you want is in that room.”

Dolly didn’t say anything in reply before storming into the aforementioned room and screaming at Ms. Coif, “Bitch!  Fix my hair.  NOW!”

“Oh, there you are,” Ms. Coif said with a smile.  “You must be confused.  Your hair is already fixed.  In fact, it’s perfect.”

“I…You…I’ll…” Dolly dropped her towel and charged headfirst at Ms. Coif, only for a cylinder of glass to rise up from the floor and trap Dolly where she stood.

“Now now, you really should clean up,” Ms. Coif said.

A few choice gestures were all that Dolly could manage just before a pink liquid filled the space at a rapid pace.  At first, Dolly thought that she would drown, but then the capsule retreated around her and she was clad in a poofy diaper, a pretty pink dress, and had a yellow ribbon atop her mullet; she also found herself tied to a pole via pale purple ribbons.

“That’s a good baby,” Ms. Coif said.  “Business up front, party in the back.  You look so adorable.”

“Mullets suck,” Dolly said as she struggled against her bonds.

Ms. Coif and everyone within earshot gasped and reeled back.  A couple others cried while shouts of “Blasphemy!” rang out.

“How could you say such a thing?”  Ms. Coif readied a large paddle and swung it hard against Dolly’s behind.  “Bad baby.  Bad baby.  BAD!  Why can’t you be more like your sister.”

“S-sister?”

Ms. Coif nodded as Princess walked in wearing an outfit identical to Dolly’s.  Her smile perfectly mirrored Ms. Coif’s and her newly blonde hair had also been fashioned into an all too familiar style from the 1980’s.  “Hello, Sister.  I’m Princess Pretty-Mullet,” she said with a giggle and a curtsy.  “Isn’t my hair wonderful?”

Dolly stared speechless with a disgusted look while Ms. Coif walked over to a rack of strange-looking glasses.  “Princess is a wonderful baby,” she said.  “Soon you will be, too.  I think I’ll try this pair out.”

Once she saw the specs on Ms. Coif’s face, Dolly let out a huge gasp.  “Leila?  Is this one of your pranks?”

Leila gave a slight giggle, tilted her head, twitched, and said, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.  I’m Ms. Coif, your Babysitter.”

“Drop the act, Leila.  I know it’s you.  The mullet may have thrown me off, but those glasses blew your cover.”

Leila’s face contorted into a crazed, smiley expression.  “I’m…Ms. Coif, your Babysitter.  Just as my eyes have been opened to the perfection that is mullets, so too will yours b-b-be.  Now hold still.  Only good babies get to be Babysitters when they grow up.”

“Leila, snap out of it,” Dolly said.  “This isn’t funny.  Do you even realize what you’re doing?”

A strange energy emanated from the brainwashed Leila’s lenses and Dolly’s eyes went blank.  “Good girl,” Leila said.  “Now repeat after me.  Business in the front.  Party in the back.  Mullets are forever.  It’s what Perfection lacks…”

===========================

“Can we have a cleaner in room 7?  A cleaner in Room 7?  The applesauce is back…help…?”

“Someone get on that already!” Dr. Dirk “Debra” Wrangler shouted through the loudspeaker.  “Anomaly 912, yet again you vex me.  Why must you hate mullets so?”  He then got back to work admiring the various camera footage displayed of the supposed spa, which was actually a front for Spearmint Society to kidnap more “volunteers” for their TFTG experiments.

“Ah, mullets everywhere.  All is right with the world.”  Dr. Wrangler lay back in his seat as he admired more of the “perfection” that he and his brainwashed masses were forcing onto others.  Suddenly, he saw something that made him jump up and shout, “BLASPHEMY!”

One of the spa’s “employees” was sobbing in a corner.  Someone had run a razor down the middle of her mullet.  Dr. Wrangler banged his fist against his chair and shouted, “Who would dare sully perfection?”  He frantically searched the other cameras for signs of the offender.  “912?  No, that thing would’ve done more,” he said to himself.  Eventually he caught sight of a trail of destruction; someone’s dimensional rifle had exploded, though that was not unusual for Spearmint.  However, the carnage didn’t stop there; someone had been repeatedly smashing the walls and leaving a trail of carnage in their wake.  Another “employee” with a trainee nametag titled “Princess Pretty-Mullet” had met with a razor as well.  This destruction, it was heading right towards-

BANG!
BANG!
BANG!!!

The door to Dr. Wrangler’s room gave way and he quickly turned around. Dolly was donned in a pretty pink maid uniform with a diaper; her mullet was riddled with the broken combs and scissor blades of multiple failures to correct her seemingly indestructible do.  She had a large razor in one hand, a dimensional rifle held like a club in the other, and a murderous look on her face…